Currently browsing the Conflict Resolution Category

Woman Wants Child and Husband Doesn’t

Dear Neil:  I am a 38 year-old woman who has recently married a 50 year-old man with two grown children.  I would dearly love a baby, ...read more

Resolving Hot-Button Conflicts

Note: This is the second of a two-part series.

Even lawyers aren’t always adversarial. Many lawyers will acknowledge that a successful negotiation allows both sides to walk away from the table feeling content with the outcome.

But all too often, couple’s who can’t resolve ...read more

Long Distance Obstacle

Dear Neil:  My boyfriend (Type A personality) and I (Type B) are on the brink of calling it quits after an 8 month long-distance relationship.  Up until about 10 days ago, everything was wonderful.  Truly wonderful.  We had begun discussing marriage and we were both sure that we’d ...read more

Solving Relationship Problems Requires Compassion

Note:  This is the third of a three-part series.  

Want a technique that will replace your anger and resentment with something more compassionate and loving?  Steven Stosny in his groundbreaking book You Don’t Have To Take It Anymore (Free Press) explains how to rid yourself ...read more

Making a Behavior Change Request

Note:  This is the second of a two-part series.

Want to control your impulse to criticize or complain about your intimate partner?  More importantly, would you be interested in having your partner consistently meet more of your needs, wants and desires?  Try making a behavior ...read more

Regaining a Relationship with Your Grown Children

Dear Neil:  I have completely lost contact with my grown children (ages 30 to 18).  Their mother and I had a nasty, acrimonious divorce, and she practiced child alienation, bad-mouthing and condemning me a great deal to them.  I feel rejected by them because it feels as if they have ...read more

The Way Around Somebody’s Defenses

Dear Neil:  I am so frustrated with my husband that I’m thinking of separating from him.  I don’t believe in divorce, but I’m not sure I can tolerate living with him anymore.  Anything that even hints at me telling him I’m upset with him, that I don’t like something he has ...read more

Clearing The Air in Your Relationship

Dear Neil:  My relationship with the man I’ve lived with for seven years can get very volatile at times, and tension can build uncomfortably high between us.  There is a fair amount of distancing, withdrawal and irritability between us.  But both of us are conflict avoiders, and neither ...read more

Solving Seemingly Unsolvable Conflicts

Does this problem sound familiar?  She wants him to take a larger role in housekeeping, domestic chores and keeping the place picked up.  He wants her to get off his back.

Don’t relate to that issue?  How about this one?  She wants to socialize with and meet new people ...read more

Personal Power Doesn’t Require Anger

Dear Neil:  Thanks for your recent column on anger.  What’s been fascinating for me is to realize how ill-equipped I am to having any reaction other than anger or feeling like a doormat.  Learning to rein in anger is freeing, but if people who have relied on anger for power don’t ...read more