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Integrity

Agreements With Self Lead to Higher Self-Esteem

Looking for better self-esteem?  Higher self-worth?  Increased self-confidence?

The following ideas about how to achieve a better relationship with yourself—which are really good rules for living—are taken from Don Miguel Ruiz’s excellent book The Four Agreements (Amber-Allen Publishing).

If you want better self-esteem, make the following four agreements with yourself and then be sure to follow up and live by them:

Integrity and Honor

Living as a Mensch

Living as a Mensch

Are you a mensch?

A mensch is a person of integrity and honor.  A good person.  Honorable. Trustworthy.  Reliable.  Someone who does the right thing the vast majority of the time.  Someone whose word you can hang your hat on.  Kind.  Compassionate.  Gentlemanly or gentlewomanly.  Someone who treats people right.   

So, are you a mensch?

Lack of Integrity Injures Self-Esteem & Self-Worth

Dear Neil: I am a pretty religious man, and I believe that I should operate by the highest standards and principles. But I don't always do it. On a couple of occasions, I have been unfaithful to my wife, skipped my son's baseball games with the excuse that I had to work, and I don't always tell the truth to others, either. I think this is because I have low self-esteem. What do your think?

Jordan P.
Los Angeles

Integrity is Within Your Control

Dear Neil: I am having an extramarital affair, and I am wondering where integrity fits into the picture for me. Could you address the subject of integrity?

Jana G.
Atlanta, Georgia

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